Defragging the brain...
...to make room for creativity in 2025
Before we return to Cornwall and my adventures there in next week’s post, I’d like to tell you where I’ve been during Christmas and New Year. This is, as always, because I think my experiences of This Writing Life might resonate with at least some of you.
With social media our absences are rarely noticed whereas our presence is constantly rewarded in an eternal feedback loop of dopamine hits that will make sure we keep coming back for more. Add to this the industry expectations on authors (and other creatives of course) to gain a following and engage in continuous marketing in order to build a brand, and hopefully sell a book or two along the way. I should make clear here that I’m talking in particular about Instagram, which I feel I need to continue to maintain as it provides me with work.
If you’ve been reading my newsletter for a while, then feel free to skip the next paragraph, but for new subscribers, here’s a quick summary of the last year and a bit:
My debut novel The Shape of Guilt was published in October 2023 by époque press. I went to work straight away on what I’ve been calling My Year of Promotion. During 2024 I posted and engaged with others on Instagram nigh on every day, I travelled aplenty to engage in author events both in the UK and abroad, talking in schools, preschools, libraries, at festivals, at universities, in bookshops, to writers’ groups. I did online events, appeared on radio, podcasts, even live TV. I had articles written about me and I had my own first ever article published in The Bookseller.
As you can imagine I entered the holiday season close to burn-out, but worse than that was the state of my brain. It’s only now, after these weeks off, that I realise not only did my writing time become fragmented, with me checking e-mails and social media every five minutes, from first thing in the morning to last thing at night, to see what results my efforts had yielded, if likes and comments can even count as results, but the quality of my writing suffered. My writing practice last year now feels disingenuous as if my frazzled brain was trying to play to my Instagram audience rather than me looking inwards to mine the precious stuff that my subconscious will produce if only left alone to daydream for long enough. The upshot of this is a harsh truth I don’t really care to admit: in 2024 I had not a single story, in either Swedish or English, accepted. You’ll find a break-down, of lessons learned during 2024 here:
How to alienate an audience
If my writing strikes a chord with you, a very simple way to support me is to like this post. It will help me reach more readers.
In short, I found myself feeling petty, and judging my self-worth against metrics.
So on the 20th December, I posted to say that I badly needed a break and that I’d return in January.
It was so hard at first, not to reach for the phone constantly, but luckily I had a Christmas as well as youngest and middle child’s birthdays to prepare for, and I had oldest child back from university to chat to, and who was being endlessly helpful. We had the best time cooking together and making home-made treats for Christmas, which all helped with the process of defragmenting my brain.
But let’s go back to the beginning of December when I’d already started to have an inkling of my need to step away, and due to a lucrative month in terms of translation projects back in November, I felt able, for the very first time, to treat myself to the MsLexia 2025 planner. I honestly had no idea what to expect, and I was skeptical to say the least. How could a gimmicky and seemingly over-prized planner possibly help me? But it turned out to be a beautiful thing and I spent a few days during the holiday working my way through it, setting my intentions and making a plan for implementing new habits. Whether it will help me or not, it’s been enjoyable, and isn’t that the point? Daydreaming? Being creative? Being free? Enjoying what I do?
The third thing I did over Christmas was to pick up my crochet needle to start making things with my hands. I used to knit and crochet all the time, so how could I have forgotten how it focuses me, how it empties my head of fractured thinking and so leaving space for the stories to bubble up?
I’m drafting this post on Saturday the third of January at a Writers HQ day retreat and as I write I’m feeling apprehensive about next week when I shall make my return to Instagram, because in spite of all the negatives I do enjoy the community I’ve found there. To manage my time and brain health, I have worked out a schedule and we’ll see if it works. I will allow myself an hour during late afternoon, away from the mornings, away from the evenings, and the hour will be strictly timed so as to stop that hungry beast from eating into the stretches of time I need in order to keep my mental space healthy.
If I termed 2024 My Year of Promotion, then the intention I set for 2025 is My Year of Creativity, in all shapes and forms. I can’t wait to see what results it will yield, hopefully I’ll have something to showcase for you soon. Meanwhile I’d love to hear what, if any, intentions you have set for 2025, or if you have any thoughts or advice on how to deal with social media, in particular Instagram. How do you keep yourself sane? And no, I’m not asking for a friend.
Much love and joy to you in 2025!
In other writing news:
My Substack read of the week (before Christmas), make space for the light by
Finished short story number six and sent it off to a Beta reader, and this time that person is my mentee, because we decided that it would be useful to share stories, to get to know each other’s writing, in order for me to be able to be as useful to him as possible over our year together.
Worked out concept for story number seven and can’t wait to start finding my way into it.
Met up with my mentee for our second session, and this month it was all about goal setting, and honestly, I’m not sure who finds these sessions more useful - me or him.
Received another rejection for a Swedish middle grade book from one of the big publishers.
Submitted that same Swedish middle grade book to another publisher and received a personal response the same day, just confirming receipt, but it still made me happy.
Wrote another 500 words on a newly began middle-grade book in Sweden. My focus right now is the short stories, so this is just a fun in-between project for when the concept for the next short story isn’t quite fully formed yet.
Found out that my last picture book, Eben von Ruben och husbarnet, will be going into e-book format.
Was awarded the Bronze medal for book marketing by Nicola Washington in this post:
Reading Broken Madonna by Anna Lucia.
If you have read this far you’ve already made a difference to This Writing Life of mine. But should you wish to, here are a few other options of how to support me:
Subscribing to this weekly missive from me is free for everyone, and my plan is for it to stay that way forever, but I do aim to deliver a well-thought-through observation every week, hopefully with a positive spin, a lesson learned, knowledge shared. This takes time, which is why, if you enjoy reading and have the means, there’s an option here to upgrade to a paid subscription. In a future where I have enough paying subscribers to justify the time it would take, I will add extra content exclusively for you.
Or make my day and order a copy of The Shape of Guilt, currently with free delivery within the UK from Blackwell’s (also available at Barnes & Noble)
Or feel free to fuel my creativity:
so many things to say about your reflections here! Your experiences of 'fragmentation' of your attention is one that lots of the writers I work with talk about and when it comes to social media especially I often advise people to think of it in seasons. There are seasons when your attention should be on your creative work, and others when it's necessary to focus on connecting with others in order to promote your work, but it's actually really hard to do both at the same time, especially when you add in all the demands of having a family, and possibly a job on top!!
Defragmenting the brain - the perfect way to put it! I too feel wonderfully defragmented after the break. The Mslexia planner is brilliant isn't it? I was also sceptical about whether it would be worth the cost but when I saw the number of resources it contained re publication submission windows, competitions etc I realised it would be so good for my productivity - the admin of finding and keeping track of all those dates is something I really don't like and so often don't do. And also, it's so pretty!
Thanks for recommending make space for the light. I've been recommending The Shape Of Guilt to many - and I am still thinking about it now months later. It's really an incredible piece of work.
Looking forward to reading what you create in your Year of Creativity!